#17For17In17Plus12

July 11, 2015 I received a text message from my dad in the early morning. “E Street?” it read. E Street is a motocross track located about an hour away from our home in Folsom and had long since been on our list of places we wanted to ride, especially since they have a beginners’ track. The text message came as a welcome surprise because my dad was supposed to be at work for an inventory day, but lucky for us it had been cancelled.

By the time I was fully awake and realized that a day off for my dad meant we were going riding, I sprang from my bed to get ready and help my dad load the truck. But he was so excited to get to the track that the truck was already loaded by the time I came downstairs. He was always so eager to get to the track, like a kid on Christmas morning. I grabbed my gear bag, some waters, and of course, my camera.

It was an unusually cool July day in Sacramento, which made us even more excited to get to the track. We arrived to E Street after a quick breakfast trip to Micky D’s – our favorite breakfast spot for a daddy/daughter day. Upon arriving, we passed vans and trucks of the local guys as we drove around to the beginners’ track. I rattled off the names of most of the guys we passed – “Oh that’s so and so. Look, so and so is here”. My dad turned to me with the biggest smile on his face. “You know these guys?”, he said, beaming with pride. He was amazed with the fact in only three short months since really deciding to put all my eggs into the motocross photography basket that I already knew so many of the local riders, some of them even local pros.

We fueled up and geared up and were ready to hit the track. This was an especially special day for me because it was my first time ever riding on a real track – albeit a small track, but a real track nonetheless. When you decide to start learning how to ride a dirt bike at 28, it’s a lot more challenging than when you start at age 4 or 5. My dad graciously rode behind me at my snail pace in order to help me hold my line and watch me learn to ride. I rode a few laps before pulling off – feeling too cautious and scared around the much more advanced “beginners”. My dad immediately followed me to the truck, “Everything ok, buddy?” “Yup,” I responded. “Just got a little scared and want to take a short break and maybe do some photos.” “Ok, I’m going to go do a few more laps,” said my dad. “Lookin’ good out there, dad!” I know he wanted to get going a little faster than my scaredy cat self, plus this would be a perfect time for me to take some photos of my dad doing the thing he loved, but had spent so many years away from.

Just as I was about to head to the track with my camera, I overheard some riders say that some guy had crashed. In that moment a sinking feeling instantly hit me right in the stomach. I ran to the track to listen for the rumble of my dad’s CRF450, but I didn’t hear it. In fact I heard nothing – that terrible silence when you know something isn’t right. I didn’t hear his CRF450 coming around the corner because my dad was the guy who crashed. I got to the middle of the track to find my dad face down in the dirt and unresponsive. It’s hard to put into words the substantial weight of that moment that would change my life forever. My dad suffered a massive heart attack that day at the track. I never got the opportunity to take anymore pictures of my dad, as my dad did not survive the heart attack. My riding buddy, my biggest supporter, my person, my daddy, gone in an instant. My dad had always said that he hoped that when his time came, he’d be riding his bike along the American River. It wasn’t his bicycle, and it wasn’t the American River, but he was called home to heaven on his dirt bike along the river. At only 58, my dad’s life was tragically cut short that day at the track.

As my entire world came crashing down, I didn’t know how I was going to continue a single day, let alone continue to pursue building a business in the motocross industry without my dad by my side. I wasn’t sure any of it would be worth it if I didn’t have my dad around to encourage me or cheer on my accomplishments. I’m lucky that my dad was never shy about sharing how proud he was of me, but with him now gone I wasn’t sure I could continue without that support. But as each day passes, I am learning that tragedy will either make us, or break us and through the fog of total devastation, I courageously made the decision to continue building Freestyle Photocross, even though every ounce of my being wanted to throw in the towel.

Flash forward to today, a little over two years from that moment that altered the course of my life forever. My dad only ever got to see me shoot one professional motocross race and that alone is heartbreaking that he never got to see Freestyle Photocross really shine as a legitimate media site. But in the wake of that tragedy, I knew my only option was to dedicate each and every race, moving forward, to my father in his honor. I wanted to live my life and build my business in a way that would still make him proud, even if he could only see me from Heaven. At the end of this season, after what started with a thousand “NOs”, I will proudly be able to say that I am the only female professional motocross photographer in the entire country who will have shot photos at every single Monster Energy Supercross race and every single Lucas Oil Pro Motocross Championship Series race in 2017 – add it all up and you’ve got #17For17In17Plus12. In addition to providing photo coverage of these events, I have also had the opportunity to write about the races as well. Ironically, it is actually my ability to write that has really given Freestyle Photocross some solid ground to stand on. I say ironically because for years my dad told me, “Krystyn, you need to write. You should be a writer. You’re very intelligent and your writing is very good.” Seeing as I never felt that my writing was anything to shout from the rooftops, I frequently responded with every version of “no” I could muster up. But now, every time I put pen to paper or my fingers to the keyboard, I find comfort knowing that this essential part of Freestyle Photocross is undoubtedly a “dad thing” with a little “I told you so” wink from Heaven.

For all the people who have told me “it will never happen”, or “you will never succeed”, or that I didn’t belong anywhere near professional motocross photography because “girls don’t really do this” I have to say “Thank you!”. Those folks may have never thought I would succeed, but they also didn’t understand that my driving force these past two years was the tragedy of losing my father at a young age. Because my dad was so deeply connected to my business and to the growth of Freestyle Photocross, sometimes being at the track is the hardest place in the world to be. Some days, I arrive to the races and sit in my car for 15 minutes with tears streaming down my face before being able to compose myself enough to head down to the track. But I know that through every challenge and every tear-filled memory,  I must press forward with my head held high, because my dad deserves that.

I’ve debated for a long time sharing this story, but as I get more people asking how I’ve made it this far and how on earth I’ve been motivated enough to make it to 29 races in a single year (30 if you count Monster Energy Cup), I’ve decided that now is the time to share some of my heart and where my drive to succeed comes from. Let me be the first to tell you that none of it has been easy. It’s been a 7 days a week grind that I’ve put absolutely everything into, because at this point, there is no option not to succeed. Even Jason Weigandt of Racer X Illustrated has said to me on multiple occasions, “Slack, you’re going to ALL of the races this year? What’s your motivation? That’s a LOT of work!” He’s right though; it’s a ton of work – an an enormous investment of time and resources to travel more than 30 weekends of the year. But even through every struggle I’ve faced from companies not paying invoices, to losing contracts to other photographers, to getting hit by a rider during St. Louis Supercross and everything in between, the hustle has always been worth it to me. Every lesson I’ve learned has grown me into a better person, a better photographer, and a better business owner. And although I was reluctant at first, I finally shared with Weege the story of my dad and how all of this is so much more than wanting to be photographing the races because it’s a job that I love. He then understood why my drive is so strong, as I’m sure you now understand as well.

Two years ago, what started out as a perfect day quickly morphed into one of the worst days imaginable.  But in that tragic moment, I experienced something first-hand from our motocross community that I’ve always known to be true – we are a family, and we help each other, especially in times of need. I had complete strangers rush over to me to comfort me, pray with me, and tell me they would load the truck so that I could head to the hospital in the ambulance. I was blessed with kindness and generosity that I didn’t even know still existed in the world. This is truly the heart of the motocross community and what makes it special and unlike any other community on the planet, and for that I am grateful. How I even made it to July 12, 2015, I don’t know, but I do know that the entire motocross family and your unending support has a lot to do with my ability to remain steadfast on the path toward achieving my goal of building Freestyle Photocross into a legitimate motocross media brand. I’ve been blessed with an wonderful amount of supporters and followers of Freestyle Photocross who have cheered me on along every step of the way and I truly wouldn’t be where I am today without all of you.

If you enjoy the content I produce, want to see more of it, and have been looking for a way to show your support for FPX, please consider sharing this post with your network. The next couple seasons and beyond, I will continue to grow Freestyle Photocross into a legitimate motocross media brand in the industry – with the goal of creating exclusive content, one-of-a-kind giveaways, and possibly even printed magazines and rider sponsorship in the future – but I can’t do it without you.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for continuing to support and believe in Freestyle Photocross. After the death of my father I truly didn’t even know if I could venture forth on this journey, but you continue to show me that I do have a place here in this industry and that you want to see Freestyle Photocross grow as much as I do.

This one’s for you, Dad! I hope we make you proud!